Thursday, January 26, 2012

2 strategies to boost self confidence and self esteem

Self-confidence is having or showing confidence in yourself and your abilities (Merriam Webster learner’s dictionary).
Self-esteem is a term used in psychology to reflect a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his/her own worth. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs (Wikipedia).
Empowering something that is empowering makes you more confident and makes you feel that you are in control of your life (Cambridge dictionaries online).
Disempowering is to cause a person to be less likely than others to succeed; to prevent them from having power, authority, or influence (Merriam Webster learner’s dictionary).
 So self-confidence is the belief about our self-worth (self-esteem) and our ability of achievement, and depending on the beliefs we hold about our self-value and our abilities our lives will be. If the beliefs we hold are empowering we will feel more confident and in control of our lives and hence capable of succeed, but if our beliefs are dis-empowering or limiting we feel powerless,  fearful, unworthy and less able to succeed.

 Usually our limiting self beliefs are due to unsuccessful experiences early in our life like childhood and youth. Letting the outcomes of such early experience control our life is not the right thing to do and it doesn't serve us so we need to examine them and find out how to deal with them. On a previous post I discussed how our limiting beliefs can cause low self confidence and low self esteem and I mentioned some tips that worked for me to change my negative self talk that the limiting beliefs caused. On this post I like to talk about two very important strategies to fight lack of self confidence. 

The first one is courage which is defined as the ability to control your fear in a dangerous or difficult situation. So if we lack self confidence because of a fear we feel when we face a certain situation, the best way to improve our self confidence is to face the situation we fear most. As much as we face the situation we will  be able to let go of the fear and improve our self confidence. It can be made gradually, for example someone who has stage fright and can't speak in public, by rehearsing to speak in front of a small group of friends or family members can be a good start. Then by increasing the number and inviting more people their self confidence will develop and grow.

“Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what? Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.” ~ Mark Victor Hansen ~

The second one is taking actions, even small ones. Procrastinating till later, till you are ready, or till everything is perfect is not a good way to create motivation. Taking regular actions toward our goal encourages and empowers us to take more steps and more actions,  it brings momentum and with every step taken we build our self confidence.

What useful strategies or tips worked for you to improve your self confidence and overcome your fears?

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